Rockin the free world

2010-10-14T21:49:00.002+08:00

"Hard To Breathe
Feels like floatin'
So full of love
My Hearts explodin'
Mouth is dry, Hands are shakin'
My Heart is yours for the taking
Acting weird, not myself
Dacing around, like the Keebler elf
Finally time, for this poor shlob
To know how it feels, to fall in love"

an excerpt from the movie Mr Deeds.

2010-08-17T23:26:00.002+08:00

I thank God. Through the highs and lows of life. He KEEPS reminding me, time and time again, he is AWESOME in this place.

Indeed, never underestimate the love that God has. Never for one moment think that he's not there, he might be a little late in coming, but he has his reasons, he knows what's best for all of us and above all things, we must have the faith to trust in Him. He who knows our thoughts, anxieties and worries can do immeasurably more than what we can fathom. that is our GOD =)

reminder after reminder, so this is what it means by : " you'll never let me go" =)

2010-07-31T00:01:00.002+08:00

It's been such a long time since i last came here to attempt to type something that's more of an update of my life then to spam words of encouragement. indeed, i love moments like these when i am sitting at my desk, enjoying the beautiful silence of the night save for the clicking noises of my keyboard and soft rumble of the fan.

it's been a long while. it really has, since the last time i really had anything decent to post up here.

life as we know it, poses new challenges every single day. the earth will never stop spinning, and life will never stop moving on. we are all confined to 24 hours each day, no more no less. thats why when you hear people say they have not enough time, you can really understand where they come from. i'm not gonna go into the stats of it all, but just take a basic guys daily routine. sleep - 6-8 hrs. work - 8-10 hours. and what do you know? half the day is gone.

haha, yes yes, we may indeed look upon this and sigh, or we can make the best of it. i subscribe to the believe of making every single minute or second of life count. whatever the case may be. it's something that i learn to do more, and appreciate for a fact now that i have turned 21. i enjoy the recognition that as a 21 year old, i'm an adult. it goes to show that from here on end, i'm no long a kid, it also goes to show that for everything that i do, i'm responsible for my own actions.

very recently, i quoted a law of Isaac Newton to my friend. it goes, every action, has an equal or opposite reaction. it applies so much to daily life.

ahh, as i look forwards, i see national service lingering over the horizon. yet again posing another challenge for me. i do admit at times i'm scared and anxious about it, but yet i know, it's something that i will grow to enjoy. i guess being in the army just brings out a certain side of me that still thinks being a solider is cool. yes i know thats rather childish for a 21 year old but hey, i'll admit that with no regrets. might be considered one of my "failings" so to speak but ah well, we all are not that perfect after all are we?

life at times really does like to dish out lemons to all of us. the sourest of the lot. but we gotta learn how to make the best lemonade we can. good old sour lemon juice ( thats life ), some sugar syrup( thats how you want to deal with it ), water and ice ( thats us )

i love life. it's interesting, it's dynamic, it's in full of potential pitfalls but with that there also comes the proverbial jackpot.

now, you may ask, why have i been rambling on and on about life over the past few paragraphs? i guess it strikes me that many people, see life as a chore. the monotony of it, and i agree i am one of those. but i guess the point i want to put across is that, if we so much as try to see it in a different light, we might just see that it isn't really that bad. indeed, we should all learn to treasure what we have, and thank God for every single day that he gives us. that we can see our family, friends, loved ones and many other people.

on the spiritual side of my life, this few months have been really great to say the least, it's refreshing and great to be able to walk closely with Him. there are some struggles along the way no doubt, but His faithfulness and love endures forever. again, there were some choice verses that were stuck in my mind for awhile. and 2 of the more interesting ones were

The chief end of man is to GLORIFY God and ENJOY him forever - I Cor. 10:31

and

To man belong the plans of the heart, but from the LORD comes the reply of the tongue. - Proverbs 16:1

one talks about glorifying Him till the end, and enjoy him forever the other talks about submitting to His will. it's great that throughout the entire duration of my internship, i felt His grace and strength at my lowest points, and now, 3 months after my internship, waiting for national service, hoping/dreaming/planning which vocation to go to and God comes in to remind me that the chief end of man is to GLORIFY him, and that to man belong the plans of the heart, but from the LORD comes the reply of the tongue.

it's during this period of my life, that i realize, He REALLY is God. like the song "Through it all" it goes : " you are forever in my life, you see me through the seasons." omni present, everlasting and loving.

every single day, let us all give thanks and be thankful, for He is indeed worthy to be praised, and if we should complain, let us remember that He is more then enough for us, that He is forever in our lives, and his promise is something we can always rely on,

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28

God bless =)

2010-07-07T12:29:00.003+08:00

Many things about tomorrow, I don't seem to understand.
But I know who holds tomorrow, and I know who holds my hand.

It's been quite awhile since i last blogged, am gonna make this a short one.

indeed, I have been on the worrying end of many things over the past couple of months. thinking about solutions to problems that have none.

Then came along the messages of not worrying, and leaving everything to him, this song came to mind ( look at the first paragraph )

A nice reminder that in all things, big, small, important, not important, solution or no solution, He WILL be there to lead and guide, it's a matter of whether you choose to trust in Him or in the World.

summing it all up, i'll leave you with a nice phrase that I we should all strive for.

The cross before me, the world behind me.

God Bless =D
Isaac

2010-05-08T19:58:00.003+08:00

When peace like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

2010-04-24T13:14:00.002+08:00

Being on holiday now, gives me ample time to do quite a lot of thinking, and it stumbled upon me that the topic that's been rummaging through my mind the past few weeks was the ever cliche topic of love.

Right off the top, i'll get this off in saying that I enjoy seeing people in love. it's that one thing that makes a person forget his or her reservations and do something utterly dumbfounding.

I suppose within the recesses of this blog, i've blogged about this particular topic a few times. those that know me, they know i fiercely guard aspect part of my life.

anyways, the fact of the matter is that, i find love such a lovely thing. i suppose nothing else aside from being held at gunpoint can get any one person to go down on his knees in public. nor do things that in normal circumstance would be deemed stupid or irrational.

that all sparked this little thought in me, how's it like to really be in love?

weird but true, i've always wanted to find out. lets see how this goes shall we?

pardon the ramblings, i know not many people read this blog, but if someone just comes around, forgive the randomness =D

2010-03-09T22:24:00.003+08:00

When Life Goes Dark, Let His Word be a lamp to your feet and a light to your path.

2010-03-08T22:47:00.002+08:00

Ive been doing a lot of thinking recently, haha, it comes in a bucketload, and i have no idea how to paraphrase it out into words, sometimes, i find i border on the superficial, at other times, i delve into the depths of my heart.

at times, you wish you could just find the right words to use to describe things that run about in your mind.

haha, indeed, words are only words, devoid of any emotion when seen on the screens, i guess thats why, many a times, i look to writing as a source of comfort or escape, as emotions can be hidden within the lines.

having said that, i guess words can only tell so much, the rest depends on how well each individual understands themselves to be able to see and understand whats going on under the surface.

2010-02-03T19:40:00.002+08:00

Haiti- Before We Forget by Joe Stowell

A nice lesson, reminder and tidbit for thought by Joe Stowell here.

In case you were wondering, he has a channel on youtube, it's StrengthforJourney, so check it out and subscribe, has a lot of interesting topics.

Isaac

2009-12-31T11:09:00.003+08:00

Well, its 31th. the turn of the new year. this is a good time for everyone to do some reflecting... indeed, sometimes circumstances make it really hard to do so.

as the year draws to a fitting close, there can be many things that i can be thankful for in this year. my last exam in Shatec, getting the intern job at Conrad, and quite a few personal others.

indeed, this year has been a very eye opening one, not only on the surface with people but also my relationship with God. There is always a reason for things that happen, and as Romans 8:28 says, that in all things God works for the good of those who love him and are call to his purpose.

indeed, this year, through all the pain, anxiety, anger, sadness, frustration and even hopelessness, there was one person who would never let me go. God was always there when i needed something out of the ordinary or something just normal.

as i look ahead, 4 months down the road, when i finish up the interning job at Conrad, i know i can look back, and say once again, that all things God works for the good of those who love him and are called to his purpose.

however hard, painful, emotionally distressing everything might seem to be, God promise that he'll pull each and everyone of us through and the promise of never forsaking us nor leaving us, is more than enough of a comforting fact to know that he's always there. for he is indeed, Jehovah Jireh and he is also Emmuanel.

so folks, don't be put down by what life throws at you ( indeed you might say, thats really hard, and i know it too, FIRST HAND ) for God will never let us be tested beyond what we are able, but for what it's worth, never EVER forget that He loves you and cares for you. for He is an almighty God, that none can phantom.

this entry is really something that i'd just like to hold fast too specially as we enter the new year, as 2010 looms, i can look ahead and stick close to the promises.

See me through God, See me through.

Isaac

2009-12-15T01:02:00.002+08:00

Just thought i'd share some verses that I really like that have been my constant source of strength and motivation.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be the glory all generations, forever and ever! Amen. Ephesians 3:20-21

Before they call I will answer, while they are still speaking I will hear. Isaiah 65:24

For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways. Psalms 91:11

Trust in the LORD with all you heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6

these are just some of the verses that pop into my head, well not the full ones but parts of it that really have helped me somehow and someway. and i just hope maybe it can help some other people out there too =)

indeed, this journey is really a hard one. but maybe, just maybe through this storm, God will really show his power. I don't really know what the outcome nor why everything is like that, but his promise that all things work together for good of those who love him, and have been called according to his purpose.

I've come to realize so many things in this few weeks, indeed, these are the little lessons, little nuggets of faith and trust. that i'm in no position to "worry" so to speak, for it's been said, and i quote : " how many of you, by worrying can add a single hour to his life? and since you cannot do this very little thing, why worry about the bigger things?"

indeed, its been much of a wake up call to me...

i know, the following weeks, might be hard or easy, i really don't know. but once again as always, i still stand by His promise that He'll never leave me nor forsake me, and don't EVER forget that. Deut 31:8

it's been quite awhile since i've had such a peace within me. a good release...

Amen =)

Isaac

2009-12-02T15:14:00.003+08:00

As i sit here, at home, waiting for work to start at 5.45, i feel, lost, and disillusioned. i feel lethargic, angry, frustrated and sad all at the same time. granted that it is partially the messed up timing that i've to start my shift at but, thats not the only main reason why i'm feeling what i'm feeling now.

all that pent up frustration, it feels like that one active volcano that's been canned up for years just waiting for the rocks on the surface to become just that slightly weaker before all hell breaks loose.

indeed, i've come to realise that all things being equal, maybe i'm not cut of for this. the long hours, the crap that you face every single day, the fact that you cannot escape from it all and the only way is to grit your teeth and pull through it, and i'm honestly very sick of doing that. indeed i'm one of those who'll take punishment by the gallon's but this is even beyond me...

every single moment, every single day i wake up feeling the dread that is going back to that forsaken place to be the person that i don't want to be. to have that smile on underneath all that frustration is something that i entirely hate. to be that fake person, to pretend that all is well.

i've crumbled to my very knees thinking about how i'm going to survive every lasting moment this coming 4 months. even as i sit here, i can feel the pressure and burden all upon my shoulders. i wan't to let go of it, and drop it. but i can't and i don't know how.

indeed my persevering heart is shattered, i've got nothing to look forward to in the coming days ahead. i'm living one day at a time.

it's times like this where i really wish i could just go atop some remote place and scream my hearts content out, and break all the bottles of emotion that still reside in me.

God, this is when i need you the most. when every thing else seems to fall apart and fail, when i myself have no more strength to carry on, no more energy to even pick myself up from the floor, i ask that you carry me through. this coming 4 month are going to be the toughest that i'll ever go through. but as certain as you overcame the cross, you'll walk me right through it right? whenever i feel lonely, or frustrated, when all the tables seems turned upon me, i want to look back and see not 2 but one set of footprints in the ground. that when all else fails God, you won't and in everything, you'll work your wonders and miracles, that is all i ask and pray God.

In times of loneliness, you'll send someone along the way God, in times of hardship and despair, you'll work you're wonderful hands and guide me God, and in everything else God i leave it all up to you to work in my life.

Indeed when i see no other light ahead of me. when all i can feel is despair and hardship awaiting for me, i'll look to you, and i know in you i'll be safe and strong, that i'll go through it.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Deuteronomy 31:8

for now God, i'll stick to your promises.

Amen

2009-10-01T20:34:00.001+08:00

I've always wondered, how much i'd enjoy it if i could just return to the innocence i once knew..

2009-09-29T21:07:00.003+08:00

kao shan, shan dao, kao ren, ren pao, kao ju jui hao.

my hilarious attempt at han yu pinying, ( any kind soul can translate that to chinese for me? =) but still the gist of that means :

when you rely on mountains, they can crumble, when you rely on man, they can run away, so relying on God, is always the best choice.

and indeed, i suppose this will be my topic of this entry today.

it's been quite awhile since i've last posted an entry, i never found the time nor the mood too. and i guess, throughout these couple of months, my walk with God was somewhat, shaky...

indeed, amidst all the work, and amongst other things, i've constantly lost track of Him more times then i can remember. but indeed i know, he is never ever gonna run away. he's always there. i guess the story about the prodigal son is very much applicable here.

i guess the best away amidst everything is that, indeed, there are some parts of my walk that i'm still struggling at, but like the story of footprints, i can rest assured.

but amongst everything, every dark cloud or every pitfall, i know You're there God, and thats all that matters.

Isaac

2009-07-21T23:06:00.002+08:00

my last post was on 24 june, seems like it's been quite awhile since i last posted something here. i guess in recent times, i've yet to find the mood or time out of the busy schedule to actually think up something constructive to type here for you folks to read. or rather, i've been using this place more for my subtle little ramblings, whatever the case maybe, today's post would be something for most if not everyone to think about, and that is where would life take you?

As time goes by, i sometimes find myself hopelessly loss in a world that seems so foreign to me, and given my ever changing mindset and fickle mindedness, it doesn't make things any easier. i found myself staring into space recently and thinking about where life would take me, the situation is very much similar to when i last had that chat with MH over the phone, but that would be a whole other blog post.

my main gist of it would be, every thing in the distance seems so far, every single lamp on that straight and narrow road is dim and dark. couple of times i found myself to be in dismay to say the least, thinking to myself, is this what's in store for me? at this point of time, there could be a million judgements running through your head about me, of which the list is endlessly filled with words like, useless and the like. but that matters not, it's only fair i guess...

but i guess there are many many turning points in life, and this is no different, no sooner than i last thought about where i'd end up in life, a familiar chord struck me, which reminded me of my faith in Him, that above all things he knows whats best, and that "worry" of all things, should be at the bottom of my list, no wait, strike that off, it should not even be there.

i guess many a times, God put us/me, into this kind of situations and predicaments in which our faith is tested to the very limits of what is known to us. indeed, i admit i've failed miserably at times, often in the starting months of my work, but that only goes to show how frail sometimes we humans can be, even tho the outlook is strong, the innermost takes so much beating. thats where faith and trust comes into play, to put every care, burden and worry upon His shoulders, because if He can carry the weight of the world upon his shoulders, then i'm very much sure he can carry you.

i've come to realize alot of things through the course of my attachment, the things that i would have never known if i didn't go down this road, my inadequacies and the like. and i guess thats why it's all linked in one way or another, if we are willing to listen, then He will show us things that will make us better in many ways. indeed, everyday, i'm still learning to trying, trying to put every ounce of faith and trust in Him and going through the days. there are indeed days that i've felt so far, and days that i've felt so warm and comforted. so every day, is a day worth living and learning more and more, in my books and the way i see it, and having the utmost faith to pull through no matter what the circumstance, cause you'll never know what might be at the other end, very much like the say, if you don't climb the mountain, you'll never see the view.

i guess you could say this is a summation of my 3 months thus far, yes, it's alot of learning and stepping stones, sometimes tripping over helplessly and feeling awful and tired, but at the end of the day, it's still Him who reigns, and it's still in Him i trust to see me through... so how's about ya?

Isaac

2009-06-24T18:32:00.003+08:00

stumbled and fell, with a thousand other failures, but yet you'll still pick me up.

your boundless mercy and abundant grace, even with all that, i'll still fall.

but somewhere i know, you'll always pick me up with that very same love and grace, dust me off and help me carry on.

for every trial and tribulation has that one lesson to learn.

thoughts and feelings for the day i suppose.

2009-06-09T18:04:00.003+08:00

Lincoln Brewster - Everlasting God.

Came across this guy here recently, and who'd have thought of mixing rock licks and phrases into a christian song and still retain it's main message and purpose without deviating to a full on rock song could come out so catchy and nice? really, it's a breath of fresh air from the usual hillsongs ( not that they're not good, they practically created the combination of rock+christian music ) but i guess this Lincoln dude here is someone to check up on eh?

i'd like to experiment down that road someday in the near future =D

check his wiki too : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lincoln_Brewster

haha, yes, i'm pretty bored and excited at the same time. well anyhows, till then, i'll be seein ya

Isaac

2009-06-06T10:29:00.003+08:00

seems like eons since i had a last entry huh? guess the combination of not having the mood nor inspiration coupled with the busy schedules have given birth to the can't be bothered to blog syndrome.

my last update was 22nd may, many moons have passed since then, i guess the amount of updates and stories and experiences i could tell or rather blog out today, would more or less fill up pretty much a lot of space, and given my weird mood right now, neither happy nor sad, pretty much zen/stone really, i don't know if anything i'll be blogging about would be incoherent but we'll see what we've got yeah?

over the course of my attachment from the very onset of it till now, the ride has seemed like so many times before, an emotional roller coaster. not because of all the work ( well maybe some part is attributed to it ) but rather the way it has toyed with my mind some what. it's that odd monotonous feeling of being happy one moment and upset the next, in the simplest of forms, it's been one step more towards the verge of sometimes breaking down.

but in all circumstances, the one thing that'll hold true, is the fact that in the face of adversity, trial, tribulation and hardships, there is always something you can find, something you can see, a reason and a lesson that can be learnt if you are willing to look up and trudge on instead of stay there and wallowing in self pity and denial.

from my own stand point, i've seen the bad days go by in self pity and denial. but through that all, it's brought my walk with Him even closer than i could even imagine, to put all my faith, hope and trust upon his shoulders and know that he'll carry me.

it's very easy for me to say, i've seen the bad bad days, but i hurriedly forget to talk about the good. and yes, it is exactly because i find the strength to look up, to face up to it and to carry on, that i can see Him in the distance, feel his love and his presence and that ever ever last promise of come unto me all who are weary, and i will give you rest, indeed my God is all powerful and awesome.

I'll leave you guys with this now, hopefully somehow, sometime or somewhere, you'd be able to understand and feel what i've typed here personally, for it is one of the most lovely things... and i believe it's something the human mind cannot phantom.

catch ya all soon on the next update, peace yo =)

Isaac

2009-05-22T09:23:00.002+08:00

All seems well since i last put a real update on this mothballed blog of mine. everyone seems to be a happy camper somewhat. it's been a real rollercoaster of a ride within the past 4 weeks. testing the human limitations and defying the laws of it. I must say though, my walk with Him has grown much stronger and better within these few weeks.

The way i treat problems or trials is very much on my own, you know, the usual bearing the load... I guess when it mattered most, my outlet for comfort was really made evident by his grace and providence.

This is just a short rambling that kinda passed my mind and sorta decided to put up here. so apologies for those who kinda expected a longer entry =)

Isaac

2009-05-18T20:28:00.001+08:00

Bobby McFerrin and Yo-Yo Ma playing together, superb aint it?

2009-05-02T10:21:00.002+08:00

Many a times, I believe we find ourself stuck in a mess that we deem to hard to break free from. maybe it's a haunting memory, maybe it's a horrid experience. Tho, life still goes on, i mean, time, waits for no man. time won't stop to hear you bitch and moan about every single problem in the crevices of your life. it's more of a take it up, move on and walk on knowing that the past will remain the past.

Tho, the contradicting factor here is that, the past, being the past, will always surface to haunt us at the most irrelevant of times, which render us completely useless and emotionally charge zombies. The older folks say, it's an experience, learn from it, and while it holds true till today, somehow or rather, given the circumstances, i think it should be changed to learn from the mistakes and HOPEFULLY not repeat them.

i know, at times, i find it impossible to make the right choices when it stares me in the face. sometimes i believe the mould of the question will be somewhat like this, would you want to lose your right or left hand first? it's issues like that, which really make choices and predicaments ever so much harder.

true in every sense tho, making the right choices sometimes leads to good outcomes, i guess it's more of a discerning thing rather than a guessing thing.

right now, i sit here thinking of the past weeks that have unfolded. it's been a journey that's been filled with ups and downs. above it all tho, i find rest and peace in the knowledge that in this fast paced world where time waits for no man to moan and whine, make choices, there's Him up there that's always my guide, and who'll wait and listen.

But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. Isa 40:31

2009-05-01T22:43:00.002+08:00

Ahh, after what seems like a prolonged absence, I'm back to update this mothball of a thing which takes up bandwith on blogspot's huge server.

all is well, all is well, on this very jubilant labour day. been working thru the past couple of weeks in housekeeping.

and for the sake of losing my motivation to type more i'll end here and help blogspot waste more bandwith! :P

2009-04-10T00:11:00.003+08:00

You know, there were many a times I wished that I could do something, make a choice or a decision without inadvertently kicking people out of my life. but when i'm faced with this Herculean task, i shy away. like always, i let nature take it's course.

when you're like me, and you stare down the reality of losing some of the closest people to you, you can't help but feel a tad bit helpless in this fast moving world of whereby people find it very hard to differentiate and draw the fine line.

at time's i've grown sick of my own fickleness and outright bluntness, but it dawns upon me that, if that's not who I am, who am I suppose to be? surly not some run off the mill showman who can take on a million impersonations and live to tell the tale, to which i'll leave to the pros.

all that aside, it sometimes just leads me to wonder really, for all that people go through, does it take that one minor mishap to make everything else seem like a distant past? over the yonder they say... My driving point is simple. it's blunt, it's too the point. but thats who i am, and what i am. and at some distant crossroad, there's bound to be some place and time to put it all out on the table eh?

my point of this post? you might call it a random meandering of sorts. maybe a rant? i guess the point is, in life, the issues we face, sometimes just pull the inner chicken out of us. harsh reality. yeap all part of this world. but hey, you'd rather be facing it up when you know how to rather than later eh?

oh well, if only huh?

2009-04-06T16:24:00.003+08:00

Ah, it's good to be back. after 3 days of no internet in lieu of my modem that konked off on me, i've been getting a lot done.

took some time off to refurbish/setup my guitars to what i like. pretty happy with the results.

chilled out quiet a bit along the way as well.

random meanderings:
had the chance to try out a $4,850 guitar, a 1978 Gibson Les Paul. Utterly amazing. it's a tonal beast really, but given the price, i think i'll have to eat mud =P. tried an EJ strat too, that one was not too fancy, cost $2,450 and boy it's cleans were to die for. haha ok my random meanderings will stop here.

till then,
ciao!

2009-04-03T17:38:00.001+08:00

Tis been quite awhile, since i've enjoyed such serenity. Peace is amazing =D

2009-04-01T23:40:00.002+08:00

Well, new skin again, decided to go for something a little less... colourful.

first incoherent post of the month.. happy april fools day people. =D

2009-03-31T22:33:00.002+08:00

geezlouis... is there such a thing as wordless emotions?

Pictures that might make you think?

2009-03-31T00:30:00.004+08:00

Fullerton Walkway

Cavenagh Bridge

Cavenagh Bridge

Some part of Fullerton

Still Some part of Fullerton

And again some part of Fullerton

This is an interesting shot, the gist of the story is that when I set my camera up, this couple, interestingly sat in that position, pity the lady moved if not it'll have been a really compelling shot.

And lastly, the beautiful but expensive CBD area

2009-03-28T23:45:00.007+08:00

sometimes, i guess it's better to get it over and done with eh? least the bugging feeling lingers...

2009-03-26T02:02:00.002+08:00

It's now 2.03 am. as of now which i'm typing this very post.

the best way to sum up why i'm not sleeping now is, i'm peacefully troubled.

An oxymoron you might think, but i beg to differ. in circumstances like this, the only way to describe it is by the use of an oxymoron.

forget it, this is getting nowhere.

2009-03-24T10:03:00.000+08:00

Throughout my life, i've done things that i've not been very proud of to say the least not very happy about and live to regret it. However, the always proverbial phrase of "in life, we make mistakes and we learn from it, and hopefully we won't repeat it again" seems to strike this chord in me.

indeed, our subconscious minds are as such, we'd either think really hard or don't think at all before stepping into that volatile state once more. Many a times we stumble and fall, and again, we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves up and move on.

Indeed, i've learnt a lot from the past. somethings change, but some don't. and i guess it's what we really strive for in life that makes us who we are and who we will continue to become by constantly fine tuning ourselves.

I guess my reason for this post is that life can sometimes be a total bitch. yes it can be, but look on the bright side that with life being such a bitch, in the process, it teaches you life lessons that you cannot learn in a class room nor from people. when life takes that ever so subtle turn, always remember that when that first door is closed, a second one is sure to open. like they always say, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. =D

Isaac

2009-03-19T17:38:00.000+08:00

As i sit here rooted to my desk, i face this somewhat zen like moment. everything is just nice and peaceful and in sync with each other. with my fan blowing rhythmically away and the pool below somewhat providing the sound of moving waves but not so much that it over powers but it does sooth the soul.

i come here with a blank mind for this entry. it's been awhile since i last felt so at peace. it's that one moment in time where you feel so airy and dreamy but yet you've not lost focus on your tasks at hand. Ah yes, it's been a long time coming really.

had some "coffee" with jack today, and it's interesting how that guy can make you look at that different perspective. no question then, to why he's "Jack the God" =P

all things equal, i'd say i'm still in this zen like state. it's a great thing. haha, i don't know if this is links up in anyway. but heck, i'm in a zen state right? whatever doesn't link up, well. i'm excuse.

haha

2009-03-14T10:41:00.000+08:00

Cross roads? where do you go? left, right or straight ahead? then the thought crosses my mind, what if i make the wrong choice? is there any turning back? will these four walls close in on me everyday?

when you're at this junction. what would you do? slug it out within yourself? or walk by faith and not by sight?

This is one of the few times that I'm this confused. where can i find solace? if only i knew.

ah well.

and i begin to wonder am i like a jigsaw puzzle that's been messed up and left behind for myself to pickup the pieces?

well thats life i guess. making choices, like I've always said. if life was not full of choices then we'd be living puppets.

2009-03-07T10:53:00.000+08:00

While thinking of how to sum up this rather hectic week, i stumbled across some very good reads and materials that i think i can put into a personal perspective. off the starting blocks, the week. all that's well, ends well. with the passing of yet another month about a week ago, i find myself devoid of any feeling whatsoever or rather lack of feeling that soon the attachments are just around the corner. thinking back, i've slaved through 2 years with the bunch of folks that have made my life an absolute joy in school, which brings me to sum up if i even have the slightest feeling of humanoid emotions.

I guess when they say absence makes the heart grow fonder they really mean it in a literal sense. Maybe after a prolonged absence from the usual staple, you either trudge on to find greener pastures or you stay within the same field. While I don't know where i'll graze on from here on end, i'll keep in mind the folks that have made my life all that more easier and great in school. fret not, you'd all will never be forgotten.

That said, I'm psyched about starting work. Not because it's a new environment, well it plays a small part, but rather, it's that indescribable feeling of that very mish mash of excitement, relief and exuberance i guess. All in all, it's a feeling that one must feel to understand.

Herein lies my post, coming to an end. with ever single letter, reverberating as i punch each letter on the keyboard. that very certainty that another phase of life is soon to start. what lies before me is that daunting task again. like so many times before. The art of adaptation and blending. what seems like a Herculean task will be made that much easier by the fact that the ever resounding promise of " come unto me, all who are weary, and I will give you rest."

Isaac

2009-02-25T19:05:00.001+08:00

Spotted a rainbow on the way home today. Here are some pics i took in a scurry. looks amazing, i mean the rainbow. =D

2009-02-24T21:59:00.000+08:00

i've pretty much been learning to play the piano on my own. must say.. it's a great instrument.

2009-02-24T20:38:00.000+08:00

hungry heart.

check that song out. it's nice

2009-02-23T23:03:00.000+08:00

as i sit at my desk, happy and contented at the fact that i've been able to relate a lot of things lately, i feel somewhat, relived. again, it's that warm fuzzy feeling that you get when you know, you've sorted out your emotions and the like.

no no don't take this the wrong way. just a random rant/quote to end this really great day =D

2009-02-19T13:58:00.000+08:00

ahh, i find myself in this familiar situation again. the often volatile situation of being at home and restless with nothing to do, but listen to good songs and chill out. i've been put into different situations these past few days. a few of them resulted in contemplative ones. it dawned upon me that, at times i can be a very... determined and strong person, but at times thats my cover up for lack of self believe... hmm it really is quite interesting to think about such things. with everything hanging in the balance, you find yourself sometimes sitting on the fence of your innermost emotions. contending with your every gut feeling. that every emotion, has a back ground to it. it's very much like the saying of using humor as a defense mechanism.

ahh, i guess as you get older and you hit a certain point in your life where you enjoy reflecting on the finer things in life. looking back and thinking and feeling blessed. yeap, it's that almost certain warm fuzzy feeling that you get from that which drives the emotions of humans.

2009-02-18T01:05:00.000+08:00

Another tag, another random spazzy quiz, another chance to know me more. oh wow!

The rules - post this list on your profile (in Notes) replacing my answers with yours.

Tag 25 people to do the same thing.

If I tagged YOU, it's because I want to know more about YOU. So does the world, so don't disappoint us.

*****

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Isaac in the bible

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
i dont remember.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Not really

4. DO YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND? IF NO, WOULD YOU WANT ONE?
nope, yeap

5. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU
yeap.

6. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
it's my middle name

7. HOW DO YOU WANT YOUR LIFE TO BE IN A COUPLE OF YEARS? (REALISTICALLY PLEASE)
normal.

8. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
yeap

9. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
banana nut crunch.

10. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
nope

11. WOULD YOU MOVE AGAIN?
the hassle of it? neh.... i like my current place

12. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
personality

13. RED OR PINK?
all gay innuendoes aside, i'd take pink for the simple reason of it being a nice colour.

14. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
that i'm not sure, i'm pretty happy with myself

15. WHAT DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
good food

16. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
couple of friends i havent seen in awhile

17. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
i don't know, but since i'm already half way there might as well right?

18. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?
brown boxers thats it

19. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
the fan

20.WHAT ANNOYS YOU THE MOST?
getting tagged somewhat

21. FAVORITE SMELLS?
nothing like good old food

22. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
dad

23. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
haha she's twowwacw. go figure =P

24. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
Soccer

25. HAIR COLOR?
black

26. EYE COLOR?
brown

27. DO YOU HAVE ANY MAJOR REGRETS?
yes

28. FAVORITE FOOD?
a list of them

29. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
happy endings

30. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED, AND WITH WHOM?
ip man, alone

31. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
skin...

32. SUMMER OR WINTER?
winter

33. HUGS OR KISSES?
hugs.

34. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
haha i won't tag anyone

35. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
read 34

36. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
nothing

37. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
mouse

38. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
i dont watch tv

39.WHAT LITTLE THING MAKES YOU HAPPY?
some warm fuzzy feeling

40. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
both legends in their own right. but i'd go with beatles

41. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
italy.

42. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
quick learner ? but of things that i enjoy

43 WHERE WERE U BORN?
singapore

44. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
refer to 34

45. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
I have none'

and anotehr quiz down the drain!

2009-02-17T21:24:00.000+08:00

Ms tracy lee tagged me on this one. looks like random spazzy quizzes are on the rise again huh? either way! off we go!

100 truths, tag 15 people to do the same. Don't forget to tag!

Last beverage → can't remember, maybe water
Last phone call → dad
Last text message → received or? if received would be fi, if sent would be my uncle
Last song you listened to → haven't heard anything as of now
Last time you cried → been quite a while.

HAVE YOU EVER:
Dated someone twice → neh
Been cheated on → no r/s-es whatsoever, so no space for cheating there.
Kissed someone & regretted it → nope. refer to top.

IN THE PAST MONTH HAVE YOU:
Fallen out of love → no
Laughed until you cried → yeap.
Met someone who changed your life → yeappo
How many people on your top friends do you know in real life? → all.
How many kids do you want to have → 1, or maybe 2 the max.
Do you have any pets → nope
Do you want to change your name → nah, i like my name has this ring to it.
What time did you wake up today → 7.30 -ish?
What were you doing at midnight last night → msn
Name something you cannot wait for → that call from hotels.
Last time you saw your father→ this morn
What's one thing you wish you could change → my height.
Have you ever talked to a person named Tom → yeap.
What's getting on your nerves right now → my flesh.
What's your real name → Isaac
Elementary/Primary School → ACS(J).
Middle/Secondary School → Kent Ridge Sec.
High School → SHATEC.
Hair color → black
Long or short → short-ish.
Are you a health freak → not exactly.
Righty or lefty → lefty.

FIRSTS :
First surgery → removal of wisdom teeth.
First piercing → none.
First best friend → in primary school.
First sport you joined → hmm can't remember.
First pet → dog
First vacation → was it JB?.

CURRENTLY :
Eating → nothing.
Drinking → nothing.
Waiting → nothing.

YOUR FUTURE :
Want kids? → maybe.
Want to get married?→ hopefully.
Careers in mind? → this is sensitive. part time musician maybe? hotelier? or something related to sports.

HAVE YOU EVER :
Kissed a stranger → no.
Drank hard liquor → yes.
Lost glasses/contacts → no.
Ran away from home → nope
Broken someone's heart → maybe.i dont know.
Been arrested → no.
Cried when someone died → so far, no.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
Yourself → yeap.
Miracles → yes.
Love at first sight → maybe?.
Heaven → yes.
Santa Clause → never did.
Kiss on the first date→ no.
Angels → yeap

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY :
Is there one person you want to be with right now? → yes.
Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? → never did and never will.
Do you believe in God? → yes.

there we go, all done =-D

2009-02-16T20:47:00.000+08:00

sometimes, you just feel a wee bit odd.. and there are practically no words that can describe that feeling at all. =/ ho hum..

ahh well, been thinking a lot lately and i suppose, my mind likes to drift to another dimension and all that.

well i'll leave it at that, i know if this post seems incoherent it most likely is.

do do do...

2009-02-09T21:51:00.000+08:00

At this point of time, with the breeze slowly beating my hair onto my face, I believe is a very good time for stoning. Alas, I've decided to up some BnW pics again. BnW is Black and White. yeap yeap.

When they say pictures speak a thousand words, they mean alot more than that. it's a thought provoking process actually. well less of my words and more of my pics. coming up.

Many thanks to baby Lucius and Edison for letting me take their pics =D

2009-02-09T00:05:00.000+08:00

Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real, DUH. If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question, ayy o

1. What is your name : ISAAC

2. A four Letter Word : IPOD

3. A boy's Name : IAN

4. A girl's Name : IORA

5. An occupation : IDENTITY CHECKER

6. A color : INDIGO

7. Something you'll wear : IN LINE SKATES

9. A food : ICE CREAM

10. Something found in the bathroom: IODINE

11. A place : INDONESIA

12. A reason for being late : I MISSED THE BUS

13. Something you'd shout : IDIOT!

14. A movie title : I AM LEGEND

15. Something you drink : ICED TEA

16. A musical group : IMOGEN HEAP

17. An animal : INVERTEBRATES

18. A street name : IMBIAH HILL ROAD

19. A type of car : IS 300

20. The title of a song : I CAN'T HELP FALLING IN LOVE - ELVIS

now if you think this was easy, no no no! i got tagged to do this ! WARGH!

2009-02-05T17:18:00.000+08:00

some pictures to share. just messing around with my camera out of boredom =D

2009-01-25T20:52:00.000+08:00

ahh.. it's all this little things that just keep messing with me..

all these little nuances...

2009-01-22T20:07:00.000+08:00

after my last post here, i got myself thinking. you could say it was a rather, contemplative day..

while strolling down orchard road today heading down towards city hall, just was kinda wondering to myself why i always kinda enjoyed remaining single, and it struck me. i'm not mentally and emotionally prepared as of yet to commit to one. but ahhh yes yes i know there are 2 sides to a coin, like wise to this whole commitment issue, but i guess on my side of the world, i have to contend within myself if i would want to give up the luxury of single hood. but that is FOR NOW, cause i'd never know when i'll be ready to throw down the gauntlet.

damn, i'm contradictory today.. go figure =/ sheesh...

no no and this does not quantify me as emo =P i'm just CONTEMPLATING =D

2009-01-21T11:18:00.000+08:00

it's a well known fact, we men need our space. we need to chill with them dudes from time to time. you know, a nice soccer game, a great jam session, a nice night out pubbing(applies to folks who drink) you know that sorta thing.

now reason i'm typing this, is cause, as sure as the sun is bright, i've been hearing of friends who complain of lack of freedom, or so they seem to speak when they're, for lack of a better word, attached.

now this, makes me wanna delve into the epicenter of this little, we shall aptly name as a discussion. and my best points of view without ever trying to be chauvinistic at any single point in time. i might get reallllllllllly blunt here so bear with me on this one.

point of debate: girls, are needy people.
fact, they like to be noticed, love to be pampered and above all, they enjoy playing hard to get. but then again, guys, here's the initiative to push them buttons.

the point of contention here is that at times, them ladies like to go over the top, wanting to spend all the time in the world with their "man" so much so, they don't allow them any free time.

now here's what i would give as a, rather invaluable advice to couples around. Balance!

yes, thats the key word. girls jolly well know, that guys, yeap, we need space, we may be rather, nice people, but still! no taking advantages. ahh but then guys, when you do go hang out, don't ever give her that false sense of security. and as for girls, the way i see it, quit clinging oh your dude, and all will be fine.

haha! i do belive this post will cause alot of... partial debate with me within my chat box, over msn or even in person. but then again, this is for folks who have a underlying need to find answers that they know but don't know how to go about doing it. so here it is. provided by the very words typed by yours truly.

now now, don't take me for a r/s adviser thou, i'm just doing this cuz it was born out of some form of boredem and some form of irritation( you shd know where the irritation comes from) either way, i belive this has been one of the most fruitful 10 mins of my blog life.

now now, this will lead me to wonder, why i'm still single after soooooooooo long =P

good food for thought people.... goooooooood foood for thought!

2009-01-15T00:28:00.000+08:00

You laid aside your majesty

one more song =)

2009-01-14T00:01:00.000+08:00

Hosanna

been listening to some songs recently. this one really resonates within me. lyrics and all.

another song i'd like to share.

worthy is the lamb

again, another song that resonates within me.

will show you guys more soon =)

2009-01-13T00:34:00.001+08:00

an oxymoronic phrase that can sum up the gist of this post would be happy struggle. mixed emotions are the sum of this post, i don't know, it's been quite awhile since i've been... like this, for lack of a better word somewhat "emo". and noooo that is not good at all...

while that phrase which goes: "absences makes the heart grow fonder" is true to some extent, i find that, given a different perspective to it, the next best phrase to use, or rather, conjure up would be: "absences makes the heart lose interest".

first day of school, wasn't that bad... just, weird... it's an emotion that lacks descriptive words for one to use...

ahh well...

i'll skip that for the moment.

if again, this post seems somewhat, nonchalant, digressive or just plain stupid, i apologies.

like said by someone, it's just a whole mish mash of things that's flowing through my mind right now, and i can't grasp the focal points... hence, my reasoning for the statement on top.

2009-01-07T00:01:00.000+08:00

sometimes, love is that one thing, that you can never comprehand. and i'm glad that i don't sometimes =) gives it a whole new meaning =)

2009-01-06T00:26:00.000+08:00

well, here's some pics of my new 450D. pretty decent, all taken on a 18-55mm kit lens and using a tripod. night shots of downtown singapore =) enjoy!

2009-01-04T23:24:00.000+08:00

2009 post!

well it's been settled, i've decided on my buying list for the entire of this year and so, my expense will be broken down into these few segments. this year, strictly NO GUITAR OR GUITAR RELATED PURCHASES!

now.. to the buy list =P:
Dry cabinet
55-250mm IS lens
50:50 lens
canon flash kit
a good tripod
camera bag
new computer
"zeng" my laptop
change of wardrobe? (if there is spare cash)

that sums up my "buy" list for 2009. haha, for you all who read this, yeah i am bored, and i'm trying to find something to post on here so that it's not empty for the 2009 leg of my blog entries. heh thats all for now!

cheerios!

2008-12-31T19:20:00.000+08:00

Ahh finally, 2008 has come to a fitting end =) it's been great! as we all usher in 2009, let us all be happy and grateful that, as one year passes, a new one comes and we are all going to be older, yes, but also wiser =)

on a lighter note, as 2008 ends, i got my first DSLR! a canon 450D. solid stuff =) a nice little christmas present to myself. haha will take some pics and post em up soon.

anyhow! happy new year!

2008-12-28T02:06:00.000+08:00

Thankful is the word. as i usher in the new year, i'm thankful. for so many things =)

worries need not concern me
for i know my God has comforted me
with his everlasting promise
i shall trust in Him
that for everything that i shall require
He shall provide, according to his will.
for his riches in glory are in abundance
and his love... never ending
his grace... ever sufficient =)

i am glad, that He understands. so no matter what, He will understand.

ahh tis is a very light hearted post, to sum up 08. as we usher in 09 let us all be thankful for everything.

heaven and earth will fade, but his words will still remain, and he will do something new today. cause, God will make a way, where there seems to be no way.

Merry Christmas and blessed new year!

Isaac

2008-12-22T23:48:00.000+08:00

ahh, after a seemingly long hiatus, i'm back to blog. i must say, it's been pretty dandy since holidays started.

there was this short period of time where i got thinking about stuff, but that'll be too monotonous and would make me sound like some emo kid to blog about it.

other than that, christmas is around the corner, and that means stuff will be coming my way!. neh, no guitar stuff for the time being, i'm taking a break from buying guitar stuff for awhile.

recently bought a new computer table, looks pretty dang nice, it's the typical L shaped one, but it aint wood, it's glass. looks awesome.

i'll prolly do some saving up, till i can afford the mixer, A/D recording interface, a electric drumset, some good quality studio monitors and a line6 UX2 for my recording needs. hence the large table. hoo..

as for other updates, i'm looking to repair my 4 year old computer system. and on top of that, i'm pretty much just slacking my holidays away. got a bbq coming up on the 27th, gonna catch Grace carol tomorrow then head to high tea. rest of the week is pretty much family time and OTOT.

new years coming soon too. soo i don't think i'll be updating this for awhile.

here's to all of you.

Have a very very wonderful Christmas and a blessed New year =)
God Bless!

Isaac

2008-12-14T00:46:00.000+08:00

know how that worried feeling, always comes up as a lump in your throat?

2008-12-14T00:31:00.000+08:00

inspiration comes from the unlikeliest of sources. to quote Dick Hoyt.

" Our message is yes you can, you can do anything you want to do as long as you make up your mind. "

determination and willpower, at it's best.

thats what it's all about. Focus.

2008-12-10T16:39:00.001+08:00

am at this page now, wanting to blog, but alas, writers block. oh well, i'll make it up in posts..

i'll leave it as,

I'm tired.

Isaac

2008-12-07T23:07:00.001+08:00

my com is messing with me...

2008-12-05T23:12:00.000+08:00

Sarah Mclachlan - Angel

Beautiful song. something that i always listen to when i feel like sleeping or just wanna chill, excellent singer with power vocals, emotive lyrics and superb showmanship to boot. oh yeah, be sure to pause the song on my blog if you wanna hear this one =D

2008-12-04T00:15:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, what you wish for, can be the nightmare of them all...

yeapp

2008-12-01T22:37:00.001+08:00

God
Grant me the serenity
To Accept the things
I cannot change,
The courage to change
The things I can
And the wisdom to know
The difference

2008-12-01T13:20:00.000+08:00

Over the past couple of years, this little blogsite, has been, or rather has remained my dumping ground for all things emotional, moody, sad, happy and any other in betweens that befit that wide spectrum of emotions. With that said, here, i'm about to pen, prolly the most moody of posts ( well, one of the more moody ones).

Just got back my english and history progress test back, can't say i'm extreamly happy with either. but still... a pass for history, that's alright. but a fail in english? neh, somethings not really right somewhere.

so that said, where does it all fit it? what do i cover within the premises of my so called "english lesson"? run on's, fragments, and all that other hulla bulla crap that be fits someone who's bloody taking a masters in english and not some student in a dip course, who so ironically, is doing a course in hotel management, read that aloud will you. HOTEL MANAGEMENT. thank you.

now you'd ask, why the heck am i bitchin so much? well for starters, i can't stomach the fact that i've failed english, not because my language use is bad, but because i don't know what a damn run on is suppose to be. neither do i know what a fragment is? now, that in essence is why i'm pretty piss and moody, how in the world am i suppose to apply that bull crap into my personal life? (pardon the crudeness)

Sure, i could just be marking and vetting papers all my life with that information, but noooo thats not what i plan for in my life, not any of that meaningless english editing that i can't care less for. credit where it's given tho, it's proven useful, and no i don't mean run on's or fragments. i mean, ENGLISH IN ESSENCE. not some editing skills.

but then again, she's just doing her job and i can't blame her for that. but still this rant, is something i've wnated off my chest for awhile now.. the exact words here that were used, examplify my somewhat mixture of anger and frustation for this. but above all that, i just hope that the rest of the coming weeks leading up to exams, would provide a somewhat crash course for this english thing...

yes, this is a very angry rant, and i'm glad i got it off my chest. for now, it's still the same.. i hope.

PS, if this post passes of as arrogance in anger, apologies, i've no better or lesser way to pen it down..

Isaac

2008-11-25T23:14:00.001+08:00

ahh, i've been trying to get a new blog skin, but they're either too lovey dovey, or sappy. think i'll be hanging on to this skin for abit more...

i'll prolly just change the picture on the left that you see
<--- yeah that one. prolly some other black and white one..
and i've realised i've this knack for all things black and white.
and andrea bocelli is getting to my head with besame mucho.

if you think this post just shouts incoherence, you think right.

mucho gracias senor.

2008-11-24T00:14:00.000+08:00

my own obsessions are my own downfalls, i think i need to take time off it.. and so aptly put by mh...

sometimes, we've got to look at ourselves from other's ppl perceptives...

yup, like a hammer hitting a nail, it dawned upon me, that my life should not revolve around one particular thing. tho at times a good thing, can actually be a double edged sword..

random thoughts for the night..

Isaac

2008-11-19T16:51:00.000+08:00

hmm, as the week draws nearer and nearer to a close, i start to see the silver lining over the horizon. yes indeed, in 8 weeks or less, will take this year to an end. there have been trials, but yes indeed, i am happy. with what you might ask? my answer that i'll leave is simply that of, bountiful amounts of gratefulness and joy, but then again, there have been times where the emotional quotient was put to the test. but then again, 19 years down the road, it's been a great great ride, with so many friends and buddies made along the way. ahh... one might say, it's too early for new year postings, but this isn't about that, it's about being grateful thus far, and just seeing how He has seen me thru till now. =)

ahh just wanted to blog out some thoughts and what better way than with the background music of canon?

Isaac

2008-11-12T23:07:00.000+08:00

I enter into the night feeling weird, the chilling winds, coupled with the shroud of dark clouds do my mood more harm than good. I've been in a stalemate of emotions, which in my case is the simplest and most uncomplicated way to put it in. I find myself lost in a sea of emotional turbulence.

The warmth the enumerates from my heart versus the chilling darkness which hides in the crevices of humanoid emotion. yes, the classic battle of what was so aptly named, and taken by me was that of Jekyll and Hyde.

Whats even more baffling, is the pure fact that the word called remorse, seldom appears in my vocabulary of emotional... shall we just label that as trinkets of self imposed sympathy?

The best song to describe what I shall term as turmoil coupled with the happiness of life. Note that Canon in D is a very interesting song choice for when you're either happy or sad... it's a very in between song.

No no, this isn't some darker side of Isaac Lim, it's the Isaac Lim in the state of contemplation and gratefulness at the same time. Conflicting interest? You can bet your bottom dollar.

Isaac

2008-11-10T00:59:00.001+08:00

i've had a really interesting week, been up and down alot. had quite alot of things to do, sort out stuff in my head, had a bit of time to myself, oh and i've finally pened down the song for russ and fidi =) done with the verse and chorus. had time to really reflect on life, my growth both spiritually and physically. i guess it's all for the better =)

ahh, decided to drop a blog entry late into the night. haha i guess i'm taking tracy's ideas of random blog postings. here's a nice song i wanna share with you guys, dan hill's sometimes when we touch

ou ask me if I love you and I choke on my reply
I'd rather hurt you honestly than mislead you with a lie
And who am I to judge you on what you say or do
I'm only just beginning to see the real you
And sometimes when we touch
the honesty's too much and I have to close my eyes and hide
I wanna hold you till I die
till we both break down and cry
I want to hold you till the fear in me subsides

Romance and all its strategy leaves me battling with my pride
But through the insecurity some tenderness survives
I'm just another writer, still trapped within my truths
A hesitant prize fighter still trapped within my youth

And sometimes when we touch
the honesty's too much and I have to close my eyes and hide
I wanna hold you till I die
till we both break down and cry
I want to hold you till the fear in me subsides

At times I'd like to break you and drive you to your knees
At times I'd like to break through and hold you endlessly
At times I understand you and I know how hard you've tried
I've watch while love commands you
and I've watched love pass you by
At times I think we're drifters, still searching for a friend
A brother or a sister, but then the passion flares again

And sometimes when we touch
the honesty's too much and I have to close my eyes and hide
I wanna hold you till I die
till we both break down and cry
I want to hold you till the fear in me subsides

it's a beautiful song, meaningful lyrics =)

2008-11-02T00:09:00.000+08:00

new month... calls for another entry.

not really in the mood for entries per se but still ushering in the new month means that i've got yet another chance to stick to my guns and move on...

random thoughts for day..
if the world wasnt driven by money, oh how peaceful it would be..

once again, i'm caught, stumped, baffled, and utterly left speechless and emotionless, that certain void that needs to be filled can't find the right volume of feelings to fill er up...

so much for a good start to the month eh?

jekyll and hyde... jekyll and hyde...

2008-10-20T22:00:00.000+08:00

every morning i wake up, head to the showers, turn on the tap, wait for it to run with seemingly hot/warm water before jumping between the flow of it. there it struck me, if only i had no cares in this world, no commitments to adhere to, no nothing to report to, just me and the world...

this seemingly untouchable freedom, that has eluded the most of us, and will continue to till we actually pass on...

sounds very scary? you betca bottom dollar on that...

i guess my mind's been stagnating on this subject/topic for a while. how nice it would be for once, that i don't have to go to school because i have to, or don't have to do something because i'm told to. or whatever the case maybe...

you know, sometimes it's just this kinda things that form the basis of escapism... the will to actually be yourself for once, the time spent not having your every move judged just because you have certain responsibilities, stereotypes that usually are acquainted with the kinda job or position you hold.

its things like that, that make people who they really are not. which brings forth my strongest point,

who are we to judge?

we, mortal human man, pick in between every nook and cranny for that one ounce of criticism to dish out, yet forget to think about that sore eye that we have...

over time, i've come to realise that we people are at times too quick to jump the gun.

i'm guilty of that, i know... i guess sometimes i just lament about the times when i was a kid, where i could do no wrong in the eyes of everyone, even if i did do wrong, it would be brushed aside as childish behavior.

this is not a reflection of my mood at present moment, its just something that i've been wanting to type out for the past week or so after going through some "escapism" that i've come to realise.

ah boy, what a cruel world we live in, but hey, suck it up and move on, cause its true to every word that, in this world, shit happens but we just gotta dig through it and move on..

cheerios

2008-10-15T00:33:00.001+08:00

had some time off today to really just catch up on things that i've left behind, stuff that has me escaping for awhile. granted that it was tough to handle, still tho, i'm feeling lighter, some baggage and weight off my shoulders.

it's just amazing how at times, with one turn of a page, you flip to something that totally untangles and settles you down. thats the work of Him right there.

thanks big guy =)

2008-10-13T23:12:00.000+08:00

you know the age old question of, if you could turn back time and relive life would you?

2008-10-13T21:22:00.000+08:00

hcagne fo virnemneont si hawt i ende...

ustj ot nru wyay rfmo ti lal.

2008-10-12T10:14:00.000+08:00

where i last left of, it was somewhat late September, streaming into Oct of 2009, it's been a pretty interesting journey thus far. newer responsibilities to match the new month. somewhat pleasant at times, but can get pretty intense...

over the course of the past few weeks, and for me to pen down every single detail would not only bored the living guts outta anyone but would also take up enough bandwidth off blogger for a day or two. so i'll skip the details and do the brief breakdown.

all in all, it's been pretty smooth thus far, new term and coping quite alright. some subs are looking to be a pain in the butt in time to come but ah wells, just take it as we go along. zhi quan's birthday dinner on friday was pretty awesome, had tons of fun.

hangin out with mh on sat was even better, managed to actually get down to "talking", just hanging out =)

ahh all in all, its been pretty dandy thus far, anyways heres a nice quote by the late great jimi hendrix

" If the power of love overtakes the love of power, then the world will know peace "

great blues guitarist who always had a nice outlook towards life.

2008-09-29T12:05:00.000+08:00

soo, it's done. 3 days of awesome fun (somewhat), truck loads of expriences and tiresome standing.

breaking down the 3 days of work, on paper, it seems and looks like a hellish journey of marathon standing and working, but that aside, i pretty much suppose the memories of working there would stay around somewhere in my head for a long time.

so here is how it basically panned out,

in total 3 days i've slpt not more than 10 hours
i've basically stood for 13hr straight each day with sums up to 39hrs
made more than 300 drinks in the course of 3 days
polished roughly 1000++ glasses
opend over 100 bottles of wine and champange
opend crates upon crates of wine boxs
served so much beer that i lost count

and all other in betweens. but that said, the expreince is really something, specaillly when working in the suites which are part of the grandstand, when the cars zoom past, the feeling is pretty much... something you cant justify with words. ah well, when it's all said and done my main focus was that expriences like these dont come everyday, hence... just grab grab grab, for you'd never know what expriences and opportunites you might get along the way =)

2008-09-22T01:12:00.000+08:00

yeap, indeed, it's been one heck of a roller coster month. to call it hectic would be an understatement.. but still, i'm glad most of it is finally over.

exams were ok for me, worship night went very well. (well done everyone =D ), sundays debut of the band in service went well too =)

i guess the word that could be used as a summation of my feelings would be thankfulness.

thankful that for everything i've been involved with this month, God made a way no matter what, indeed, i might have over looked the smaller details in life, timings and the like, but it's this little nitty grittys that make it so speical..

looking back, if worship night were to have started on 12th, and the band debut to be on the 13th, and exams starting on 14th with f1 coming up on 25th, i'd prolly have given up halfway somewhere..

but as said, just thank God for the little things like slight time changes and day changes to make this really busy busy month so much more bearable. Indeed, throughout this month, i've put myself in alot of predicaments and found myself halfway down the road of reliving my past and in some cases on the edge of reality's thread of suspending on it pondering if i want to give up or not.

yeap mh, you were right on that count of feeling i had many things on my mind, many things that were left unsaid and many things that i didnt know how to express. i walked down that seemingly endless road again...

ahh yes, it's been a journy of bottled emotions, rocky feelings and werid expressions...

but looking at the present time, going through what seemed like a game of life, i look back at the lessons learnt during the month. indeed, personally there are many things that i can take back from this "educational" month..

but all in all, Gods grace saw me through and no one can discredit that. every single step of the way he guided, lead and protected.

Still

Hide me now
Under your wings
Cover me
Within your might hand

When the oceans rise and thunders roar
I will soar with you over the storm
Father you are king over the flood
I will be still and know you're God

Find rest my soul
In christ alone
Know his power
In quietness and trust.

2008-09-14T00:31:00.000+08:00

i think i'm getting old... i think i have chronic backpains and i get random bouts of moodyness..

point given, like right now..

2008-09-12T21:09:00.000+08:00

in this fast paced world of ours, i slowly find myself slowing down. not being able to keep up with the rest of the on moving pack.

so thats what sheer exhausation and lack of will power might somehow feel like. sounds very familar? i'll bet.

no life lessons for today, it's just gonna be this one off blog rant.

and all typed in UPPER CASE LETTERS

EXAMS ARE A DRAG. but ahh well, if it's gonna come its gonna come. somewhat prepared for it. more or less.

certian subjects are kinda just floating around in my head for now.

it's rare actually.. i'm begining to approach stuff with a little more seriousness and in all honesty, i think it does me alot of good somewhat.

a little thinking once in awhile helps =)

heres something i'd like to end with. a small extraction from an email that i find really inspiring/adequet/whatever good and nice motivational words you have in your vocab

Trials keep you Strong,
Sorrows keep you Human,
Failures keep you humble,
Success keeps You Glowing,
Only God keeps You Going.

true to every word.

cheers people, oh and dont flame me if this post dosent make a splatter of a sense to you, cause heck, it's all jumbled up and in no cronological order.

thats how i function so sue me :P

2008-09-06T23:57:00.001+08:00

oh boy, it's gonna get darker by the days i guess..

2008-08-30T00:28:00.001+08:00

staring down the barrel of a 50. cali rifle, all you see are scenes of your life that flash before your eyes, with one pull of the trigger, bam, all's gone.

how many of those scenes would be happy ones? would the good times overshadow the bad? or vice versa? hence i always belived that you've got to live life to your fullest without regrets, mistakes made are lessons learnt, live in modesty and truth to yourself and others, feed not your ego.

when they say time heals all wounds, they missed out the part that says (which russell so aptly pointed out, very him indeed) but time will never remove the scars.

yeap, whats life without errors? humans have a mind of their own, so much so, we try to bend rules and personal beliefs just for the heck of it.

life suddenly isnt so rosey huh? well take it from me, and look at it this way somewhat, if it wernt filled with all the pitfalls and antagonising emotions, we'd go through life without haveing any meaning to it would we?

ironically, it's the errors of life that make it exciting.

well i've made my peace, how about you?

P.S. nope this isnt directed at anyone, it's just another post with no intentions of anything else.

2008-08-24T22:30:00.001+08:00

They always said that endless nights have dawning days, and darkest skies have shining rays, lets hope all's well, ends well..

2008-08-24T01:56:00.001+08:00

questions in my head, how'd they fair if they'd come out my lips? if only i knew... hoooo....

2008-08-17T11:24:00.000+08:00

it's been a rather rough week to say the least, patchy would be a direct understatement of things. time and time again, i'm faced with choices and desicions to make, which in some cases i have excatly no clue what so ever.

sometimes if not most of the time, in life we are faced with the task and i might add uphill task somewhat of making choices and decisions. in the process, you know you would have to put some people before others and you'll know that in the process of it all, you'd offend people in different ways and means..

it recently struck me that, in all that we do, no matter what choices or desicions we make and we try our best to fit all expectations into what we choose, it'll still end up making some people feel redundant and outright invisible, if you get my drift..

trust, as they say or to put it in a very vague and blatant context, is a very very dirty word. go figure... put your trust in man and they'll let you down sometimes if not at least once in a lifetime.

ahh well i better get goin now, catch ya all soon...

2008-08-11T22:34:00.000+08:00

Once again, today has been a day with mixed emotions..

my self control was put to the test, my heart, made to cringe and all other in betweens that would befit a rather rocky, emotional and all weird day..

the sum of my emotions today, could well tell a story which would involve, outright sarcasm, losing one's cool and sections that will have the usual breakdown/emotional roller coaster..

that said, wonders will never cease as to why i blog about such random topics now and then.. to say that i've been in touch with the closer side of reality could be a perfectly fitting excuse as to why i can randomize topics like that.

yeap... sticking close to reality lets you look at it in a much different perspective than what we'd usually do..

sheesh, what a way to start a week huh?

it can only get better. =)

2008-08-11T12:57:00.000+08:00

weirds the word, nothing sums up this feeling more now than that word. weird.

in most cases its a matter of personal choices that make you feel weird.

but today, it's a combination of personal, enviromental and all other in betweens that sum up my feelings as of today..

it's a equilibrium that threatens to collapse as and when either side loses its weight.

it's spell bounding, like hanging on a thread.

life is a messy maze. and it's made even more so with emotions that we humans possess...

2008-08-10T23:52:00.000+08:00

indeed, at times, we receive so much from others that at times we ourselves forget that others also need to receive something as well. no, not in the form of an exchange, but as and when one requires it.

i guess thats like food for thought for today. with every passing moment, we get little encouragements and pats on the back from people. day in and day out, we know that there would be this one person that, amongst the hundreds that you know who'll always be there to give you that little extra push.

but as we step back to think about that for a moment, we stumble upon the fact that, we recieve all that, but at the same time, are we churning out that same amount for others? it's better to give than to receive they always say, but what if receive and receive and never give at all? then yeap, you got it, someday that little guy out that whos always on the giving end of things would end up gone, kaput, finito, empty in laymans terms.

yes, time and time again, we have to take a reality check of our lifes. stare it in the face and search it...

which leads me to the next part of my post, God.

every single time, he's always been giving, and by that i mean his love and his mercy to me every step of my life. for my every single falter in life, i've come to realise that He isnt stingy on forgivness. and i guess after last nights mind poking, thought provoking and great chat once again with mh. i could look back on my errors of the past and see that i've learnd so much from them.

but through that all, the one line that resonates within me the most, comes from that story of footprints. that one line, when you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that i carried you.

"It was then that I carried you."

2008-08-06T22:31:00.001+08:00

First post as of Aug. hmm must say, the month started out pretty dandily, and by that i mean a test on the 1st of aug, then now a test coming on 8th of aug just nicely situated before national day. there after another test to follow on who knows when.. note the slight sarcasm?

updates, i havent did my 10km in 1 week and 4 days. havent found the time too. lemme see, oh yeah, projects are coming a knocking on my door, which dosent already have a pile load of things that i've got to do. boy time management again.

if you havent noticed yes i'm ranting. nope, it's not isaac lim to be ranting like that. but hey, i need an outlet somewhat to release the "bottled emotions" if you must call it that.

what else bugs me as of now? hmm nothing much, i think i've made my peace with myself for now.

i guess what bugs me most, is the inner self.. hmm thats prolly too in depth and wordy/draggy to be typed out here. and also given that i've recently got this lazy streak in me, which isnt good..

well i take comfort in the fact that the olympics is starting soon, which means at least some form of entertainment to fufil my boredem at home sometimes. which is another outlet instead of my guitars, which brings me to my next point, i think i have guitar poisioning. which i will leave for another post.

i'll prolly be watching more of the sprinting events and badminton games. faster pace, more excitement.

this prolly sums up my rather monotonus week. "filled" with events

2008-07-31T23:47:00.000+08:00

ahh, after so many monotonus posts i guess it's time for a proper blog entry eh?

haha, well either ways, heres some updates. currently in the process of being tied down by a million projects. being down with the flu as of today 31 huly. just got my allowance also as of today 31 july (more guitar stuff baby!!) haha and alot of in betweens =)

hmm ok, lets see throughout the month of july, events that happened in no order.

Youth sunday, haha as corrine and mh calls it, the metro isaac :P there after there was

yeap sentosa with GUM fellowship, haha being thrown into the sea is not cool. i repeat, NOT COOL! lastly if i can remember would be yisins birthday but i've got no pics with the birthday gal.

haha all in all, yes you can tell, i'm bored, very bored, either that or i'm just too lazy to type anymore so i had the pics up for your laughs anyways,
till then folks!

2008-07-28T22:11:00.000+08:00

sometimes we all struggle with a little faith... oh boy..

2008-07-21T00:18:00.000+08:00

i've been bugged by things this past few days. alot of issues with pride, and priorities. i've be a captive to my emotions.. ahh i guess it's been alot of soul searching for me recently.. anyways. i found the lyrics to this song very meaningful

From underneath the trees, we watch the sky
Confusing stars for satellites
I never dreamed that you'd be mine
But here we are, we're here tonight

Singing Amen, I'm alive
Singing Amen, I'm alive

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
We'd see the day when nobody died
And I'm singing

Amen I, I'm alive
Amen I, I'm alive

And in the air the fireflies
Our only light in paradise
We'll show the world they were wrong
And teach them all to sing along

Singing Amen I'm alive
Singing Amen I'm alive

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
We'd see the day when nobody died

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
We'd see the day when nobody died

And as we lie beneath the stars
We realize how small we are
If they could love like you and me
Imagine what the world could be

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
We'd see the day when nobody died

We'd see the day, we'd see the day
When nobody died
We'd see the day, we'd see the day
When nobody died
We'd see the day when nobody died

really, if i could just swallowed my pride, if i could love and never lie, i'd see the day that nobody "died"..

2008-07-19T23:26:00.000+08:00

it's been awhile hasnt it? i havent blogged in a week or so, never found the mood too, it's been fine so far, into second week of the new sem, and i think i'm coping well, just that i've got my hands so full... too full to even have time for myself and others and i feel somewhat guilty about it. not so much so that i always reject offers to go out, either based on biasness or just pure laziness, but rather somewhat tired and exhausted from trying hard to fit every minor detail into the short span of 24 hours.

i somewhat feel guilty, yeap guilty, that i do things based on biasness at times. "And as with all Dr Jekyll, the fear of Mr Hyde merging into your life, the fear of the past catching up" as quoted by mh.. yeap, so here it goes, the jekyll and hyde in us all...

apologies to thoes i have yet to spend enough time with. it just struck me so suddenly while chatting up with mh (thanks dude, =) )

i guess priorities in life are there for you to balance out your life, and i think that's something thats been totally shadowed out of my life. be it school, church or just my own time. i failed to strike a balance in life.

i've still got a long way to go before burdens of the past can be lifted off my shoulders, but for now, i know i can take comfort in knowing i've more or less identified one of my issues thats been bugging me.

be it whoever that reads this, this should serve a reminder that, balance in life no matter how little, is still required. for the simple reason that, we dont overload and the emotional baggage that will come with it is lightened, well more so for me now tho...

2008-07-06T01:29:00.000+08:00

I NEED ANSWERS DAMNIT!!!! ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS THAT I DONT KNOW HOW TO SOLVE!!!!

DAMN IT WHY!!!!!??!!?

WHAT THE HECK DOES IT TAKE HUH?!?! WHAT THE HECK DOES IT TAKE?!?!?!?!

ARGH!!!! DAMN IT.... NO MORE CRIMSON KNUCKLES, NO MORE..

THATS ALL I CAN TAKE.... THAT ALL I CAN TAKE....

thats all.... thats all...

no more....................................

2008-06-29T00:05:00.000+08:00

Ahh, time after time, i still think that i'm an old softie at heart. no matter how hard hearted i can get at time, still.. ahh

i think that i'll begin to miss working at charcoal. just hangning out with the closness of 18 folks working tgt, ahh i'd miss the feeling.

bonds were tightend and new ones were formed as well =)

i think grateful would be the perfect word for the feeling.

though i may complain in the past, i guess i've learned many valueable lessons from the attatchment. it's gonna be missed.

not forgetting the pastry people, kitchen and sft's. you folks will be missed

ahh good times =)

2008-06-23T00:43:00.000+08:00

time well spent my friend =) time well spent at vivo.=) lookin to the next one ;)

2008-06-21T12:06:00.000+08:00

what's this emptiness i'm feeling? It's so foreign...

2008-06-21T01:50:00.000+08:00

To call me emotional would be an understatement at times. To think that i've got a high anger tolerance level is even more so an understatement.

What could be worse than a slap in the face by those you actually are gradually willing to accept?

pretty much kinda like a bummer isnt it?

then this cliche gets thrown at you, life's like that.

oh boy isnt that really overused? i mean there could be a thousand and one more reasons for that then "life's like that".

i think it's a trend with the world these days, we're too lazy too too lazy to actually listen and dish out help when required and just stick to one lame line of lifes like that.

the cliches of life. the irony of it all..

when i'm faced wtih issues, my only answer to that is.. you guessed it

Life's like that...

oh boy..

2008-06-17T14:03:00.000+08:00

while at work today, it suddenly struck me. To put into a very vague context, what good is it if a man gains the whole world but loses his soul? In both biblical and current context, i some how or rather feel that life is rather. I don't know how to put it.. I really don't. While i gain something i'll lose something. To put it in words, life sometimes just feels a little screwed.. And at such a time..

i guess, being mentally prepared isnt the best option. no matter what the situation mental preparation will still lead to breakdowns and even further grief for that matter.

sometimes life derives from me different contexts. its unexplainable and somewhat unimaginable that the once calm and collected can be irriated into a full blown firework of anger in the matter of seconds by the use of words and phrases which a actually quite colourful, so much so that it wont appear here.

the idea of this post isnt for coherant reading it's for my random ramblings and various thought process throughout the day. and i'm finally making this blog known to 2 folks from my class in shatec.

so fir and russ if you read this, rejoyce, you're the first 2 folks of 0407A to read my blog :P childish aint it? ah well, and this is also a side note message to you 2 that adamns road is still waiting for your arrival firdaus. nasi lemaks calling your name. russ i dunno but all i can say is, ah heck lets all catch up one fine day shall we?

isaac

2008-06-14T00:59:00.000+08:00

when you look me in the eyes and tell me that you love me, and that everythings alright. when youre right here by my side when you look me in the eyes, i catch a glimps of heaven. i find my paradise when you look me in the eyes..

interesting isnt it? i'm hooked onto sappy and cliche love songs for some apparent reason. me being the ever ROCK HEAD, can actually enjoy songs as such..

haha, i guess change is an ever occuring thing. it's a evolution of human emotions i presume.

i love this sentence tho,
when you look me in the eyes and tell me that you love me.

it's beautiful and yet cliche as it may be, is still the nicest/sweetest thing one can do.

looking into someones eyes and just saying the 3 words,

oh how i've wrestled with that thought for so long..

i guess after all these years of being single just sometimes feels so monotonus.

you know, having stuff that you can share with your companion it's a lovely thought isnt it?

haha yes yes sappy as it may seem, it really is me Isaac Lim typing this.. and no this is not a desprate cry for girls nor is it a attention seeker post.

it's more of a summary of my thoughts the past few week and months.